light

It's Tuesday. I step out into the deep pitch of the morning and mentally prepare for the drive. I don't like driving this early.  Out of nowhere, white orbs hurtle toward me. They pierce the darkness and cause me to squint. I fight the urge to just close my eyes. Instead I focus on the tail lights in front of me. I know the one driving will always lead me to safety; he's been doing that for almost three decades now. Still my hands instinctively grasp tighter. My jaw clenches.

A podcast keeps me company, diverts my attention from my fear. I glance at the clock and calculate how much time is left in the journey. A few minutes later, I repeat the same exercise. Rural darkness is like none other; it completely engulfs its surroundings. I know where I am, not because I see landmarks, but because I know how long I've been driving.

Mercifully, it is over. My husband keeps driving to work, but I park and breathe a sigh of relief. I have arrived.

Women start to trickle in. Sweet greetings give way to prayer. We open the Word and read. We study together. We exhort one another. We share our lives. We talk of things into which the angels long to look. I devour it all greedily. This feast, this is why I have come. 

I was not made for a Pinterest and Instagram world, where sin is cropped and filtered until it looks amazingly beautiful. I need people who have compassion for my broken, sin-sick soul.  I need these ladies who declare that only the Gospel heals and makes me whole again. I need these friends who persistently shout that in my ear, loud enough to drown out the seductive whispers of the enemy. I need these sisters who are willing to do battle alongside me, who are willing to fight for me. They are precious. 

When we are finished, I walk back to my car under a canopy of pink and grey. The sun has risen. Light has come.

But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession,
that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light.
~1 Peter 2:9

...at one time you were darkness, but now you are light in the Lord.
Walk as children of light
(for the fruit of light is found in all that is good and right and true),
and try to discern what is pleasing to the Lord.
Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them.
~Ephesians 5:8-11