Thursday, October 24, 2013

Recalculating...

Considering it's been more than a month since I've written about the Autumn Blogging Project, I think we can declare it a bust. The reasons are many.

Blogging what I learn about being obscure seemed like a good idea at the time.  Not that I think it's a bad one now, and therein lies the irony. In some ways wanting to live an obscure life prevents me from publicly sharing how I'm learning to do it. And not writing has emphasized certain truths about living quietly and obscurely. For instance, not writing a Thankful Thursday post does not mean that I'm ungrateful for the Lord's blessings in my life; however, I have caught myself wondering if people will make that assumption.  I seem to have forgotten that my life - thoughts, emotions, activities - is not validated by publishing it on the internet. A life lived privately and quietly is no less a life (though our current culture might disagree). In fact, I think it may be more of one.

Added to this is a discussion my daughter and I recently had about being a jack of all trades.  She and I agree that it is far better to invest in doing a few things well than to be content with mediocrity in many things. With a multitude of possibilities clamoring for my attention, I am deliberately choosing to narrow my focus.

Being a help meet to my husband

Raising my daughter

My own spiritual and intellectual growth

Becoming family in our new church home

Serving the Lord well in the other roles He has given me (daughter, sister, friend)

These are the parts of my life in which I want to excel, blogging is not.

I'm not retiring the blog, but I am taking a step back from it (and from all other social media). The people in my 3D life who mean the most to me don't read my blog regularly (if at all) and my online friendships are not sustained solely through social media. While I won't be gone completely, I doubt anyone else will notice my less-noticeable virtual presence.

I'm going to spend the coming months pondering the changes necessary to accomplish my goal (bearing in mind that I will never fully attain it this side of heaven).  When I resume blogging here in 2014, I hope to have a plan that encompasses all the areas of my life and allows me to focus on them diligently, yet simply.


Monday, October 7, 2013

15 Things I Want For My Daughter

Today marks 15 years since the doctor cut open my body to deliver a piece of my heart. 15 years that my husband and I have loved this girl the Lord has given us. 15 years of stumbling and failing as a parent. 15 years of much-needed grace. 15 years of heights and depths I never could have imagined. 15 years of love.

As I ponder these 15 years and how they've passed so quickly - so quickly - I think of these 15 things I'd like most for her:

1. "..strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge" (Eph. 3:18-19)

2. To forget what lies behind and strain forward to what lies ahead, pressing on toward the upward call in Christ Jesus (Phil. 3:13-14)

3. To guard her hear with all vigilance (Prov. 4:23)

4. That the Word of God will always light her steps (Psalm 119:105)

5. To remember that "the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart." (1 Sam. 16:7)

6. To "do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant" (Phil. 2:1-8).

7. To work out her salvation with fear and trembling (Phil. 2:12)

8. To "walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God." (Col. 1:9-12)

9. To long to dwell in the house of the Lord and gaze upon His beauty. (Psalm 27:4)

10. To "be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger". (James 1:19)

11. To "do all to the glory of God" (1 Cor. 10:31)  

12. To be wise in her all of her relationships and remember that "a threefold cord is not quickly broken." (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12) 

13. That the Lord will fill her mouth with laughter (Psalm 126:1-3)

14. To "only fear the Lord and serve him faithfully with all [her] heart" (1 Samuel 12:24)

15. To love the Lord God with all her heart, soul, and might. (Deut. 6:5)

May it be so, Lord.